Publishing is a waiting game. I know this isn’t earth-shattering news.
But I’m not talking about the parts of the process well beyond my control.
I am talking about waiting on myself.
I estimated I would finish my latest revisions in a month or two. Fast forward six-plus months of really consistent work and here I am, celebrating an end. An end, not the end, because I might not be done. But that’s one of the things I love about creating something: it can be ever evolving.
Still, working for days, weeks, and months to create my best words is, well, a long time.
Some days my book is a three-year-old who won’t behave. She sulks in a time-out, reassessing how to get along better with others.
Other days she is a preteen who needs alone time. She’s up in her room, earphones jammed in her ears, trying to make sense of this wild world.
And other days she won’t leave my side and I won’t leave hers. We’re loyal best friends, in sync. We read each other’s minds. She is my every minute.
I am incredibly driven to make my writing dream a reality, and it’s frustrating sometimes that I can’t get myself there faster. Even if I work every single day, even if it’s running through my mind when I take a shower or unload the dishwasher, even if my butt’s in my chair until it aches, even if the pages before me aren’t blank—it just takes so much time to do justice to what’s in my heart and head.
We all know we probably won’t get as much time as we’d like to fulfill our dreams. We all know we don’t get forever. Sure, it’s depressing.
But I can also appreciate that time is one of my biggest allies. Over time, the story grows even bigger in my heart and lives in my dreams. Over time, I get to see it with dozens of new eyes. I tear it apart, piece it back together, and add more clay to sculpt it into something only I can create. That objective distance that only time gives is invaluable. Sometimes the hardest work is patience.
You can’t have a journey without the passage of time. Mine makes me see how much I’m improving as a writer. Evolving. It allows me to appreciate my dedication as I continue rolling up my sleeves and tackling challenges (many I’ve created for myself) because I love it so. And counting the days, weeks, months, and years reminds me I’ll never quit, not after all this time.